last night

Last night we went to a friend's house with wings, met some more friends with pizza and watched a movie. It is kind of a tough time for us to take a night to watch a movie. We're busy - crazy busy, as are other people in life. But when taxes are your main business and the calendar turns to April, it is hard to justify a movie night that you might just put off a couple of weeks. Except that it is Good Friday and the movie we watched was The Passion of the Christ.

We went with a group from our church when this movie first opened in 2004. It had such an effect on the audience. I still remember the end of the movie when the credits started to roll and no one moved or said a word. The only sounds through the movie were some gasps and much sniffling...and then at the end...silence. People were so overwhelmed. It was horrible and beautiful all at the same time. And I felt so undeserving of such a gift; such a sacrifice that you could sort of gloss over before.."was crucified, dead and buried." But "crucified" was so vividly cruel - so much more cruel for Jesus. And I wonder many times if I was worth it. When they look down from heaven and shake their heads at what the world is now....and I wonder if I'm being enough of what he wants me to be...but I have to accept that the biggest part of this is GRACE. HUGE...